Escape.......

I have suddenly become aware of the fact that I have been spending an awful lot of time browsing through blogs and looking at different things on the web, in order to escape the difficult things that are happening in my life right now.

It is really amazing how much time you can spend on the internet and getting lost in other people's seemingly carefree lives. Of course I know that is not the case, everyone has their own issues to deal with and problems. But somehow, reading about others lives and even their problems helps me escape from mine.

Living with someone who is dealing with addiction and healing is a long and sometimes lonely life. The pain and struggle that the loved one goes through is a vicious cycle and is so hard to watch. I sometimes think I experience as much pain as he does, though of a very different kind. Now we are almost at a place that he can have some healing and even the close approximation of a cure. Dare we even think that a cure is possible? It is almost too much to comprehend, living without the daily struggle to stay in recovery. Though much of this "cure" will include the same tried and true methods of counseling, support, and constant vigilance, it is supposed to be much easier. We will see. In the meantime, dealing with the issues surrounding addiction has me paralyzed. I cannot seem to get things done for feeling constantly on guard